"With every deed you are sowing a seed, though the harvest you may not see."
-Ella Wheeler Wilcox
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Monday, August 13, 2007
My Little Rose
My sweet Emerson turned 12 months on July 17.
Her birthday party was a good one---all of the usuals--party dress, good food, great people, cameras snapping, presents, and the ultimate "Happy Birthday" song (which we had to sing twice, per request of the grandmas who thought Emerson was "so cute" when everyone was singing to her). And of course, we had the adorable cupcake-wearing one-year-old. She may be little, but that girl can eat cake! Jason and I invited family and a couple of very close friends who, for one reason or another, we consider family.
My friend, Stacy, who is definitely a soul sister, came up from Austin with her husband, Stephen. She and I were able to spend some time chatting on Saturday morning. We were discussing the pros and cons of "staying at home" with your children.
Allow me to briefly stand on my soapbox here... I will refrain from explaining why the term "stay at home" itself makes me laugh...it would take too long to explain, and well, you can probably guess why it tickles me. I will say this though: the last time (yes, I'ved been asked more than once in a rude way) a working Mom asked me "what do you do all day long," I told her, "I do all of the things you are paying someone else to do for your child, except that I don't get paid." The point?...Staying at home is a job...people get paid to do it. Let's support each other, ladies and gentlemen! Ask me a passive-agressive question, and I'll give you a direct answer. Why go there with each other anyway?
Anyhow, Stacy and my conversation started because I was telling her that I couldn't believe how quickly a year had passed and that each passing month with Emerson was better than the last. I relayed to her that someone told me that I needed to "stop and smell the roses." I found the person's comment funny. I told Stacy that being a "stay at home" Mom has allowed me to not only smell the roses; but in fact, plant, water, groom, fertilize and watch the roses grow in the direction in which I am grooming them. The smell, well, the smell is simply divine and lingers on me most days. And still, the time slips through my fingers.
The reality is that people spend too much time worrying and judging. Children turn out OK whether you put them in daycare or not; everything evens out in the end. You have to do what is best for your family's journey. Stacy agreed and then went on to say that she doesn't worry about what her children will miss by being at home or not, more what she will miss of her children if she works outside the home.
And she nailed it with that comment. In the end, my sweet Emerson will learn to read and write. She'll fall in love and have her heart broken a half dozen times until she finds the "right" one. She'll try her hand at different sports and activities. She'll do all of the things kids do. And through it all, she'll know that Jason and I love her. But, I imagine that at the end of her childhood, she'll hardly remember the days that I stayed home with her during her infant and toddler years, but I will remember. I will remember that I saw her smile for the very first time. I will remember that I taught her to sit and stand and that when you ask her where her mouth is she points to her mouth and smiles. I will remember that it was me who watched her taste oatmeal for the first time. I will remember that I taught her to "turn the page" of her books by herself. I will remember that she giggles all day long, loves to pet her dog and play with her cats' tails. I will remember that when she sees that the gate is open, she makes a bee-line for the stairs because she loves to climb them. I will also remember that she already knows she is not supposed to climb the stairs, as she always looks back at me to see if I am watching her. I will remember the first tantrum she had when I first taught her the word, "no." And I will remember that she follows that first rule already. I will remember that the other day I asked her if I could have one of her blueberries and she shook her head "no" at me. I will remember.
And that is why it is so easy for me to give up an outside job...it's not just Emerson's journey that I am on here, it's my journey...a journey that I enjoy being free of complications and full of memories of new experiences and challenges with this smart, little person. I am thankful that I have the choice to be with her during the day. I am thankful that when Jason gets home at night he is happy to hear from me what she learned and what new tricks are up her little sleeve. I'll never take it for granted. I could smell a million roses, and I would never take the sweet smell for granted. It's been a glorious year.
Her birthday party was a good one---all of the usuals--party dress, good food, great people, cameras snapping, presents, and the ultimate "Happy Birthday" song (which we had to sing twice, per request of the grandmas who thought Emerson was "so cute" when everyone was singing to her). And of course, we had the adorable cupcake-wearing one-year-old. She may be little, but that girl can eat cake! Jason and I invited family and a couple of very close friends who, for one reason or another, we consider family.
My friend, Stacy, who is definitely a soul sister, came up from Austin with her husband, Stephen. She and I were able to spend some time chatting on Saturday morning. We were discussing the pros and cons of "staying at home" with your children.
Allow me to briefly stand on my soapbox here... I will refrain from explaining why the term "stay at home" itself makes me laugh...it would take too long to explain, and well, you can probably guess why it tickles me. I will say this though: the last time (yes, I'ved been asked more than once in a rude way) a working Mom asked me "what do you do all day long," I told her, "I do all of the things you are paying someone else to do for your child, except that I don't get paid." The point?...Staying at home is a job...people get paid to do it. Let's support each other, ladies and gentlemen! Ask me a passive-agressive question, and I'll give you a direct answer. Why go there with each other anyway?
Anyhow, Stacy and my conversation started because I was telling her that I couldn't believe how quickly a year had passed and that each passing month with Emerson was better than the last. I relayed to her that someone told me that I needed to "stop and smell the roses." I found the person's comment funny. I told Stacy that being a "stay at home" Mom has allowed me to not only smell the roses; but in fact, plant, water, groom, fertilize and watch the roses grow in the direction in which I am grooming them. The smell, well, the smell is simply divine and lingers on me most days. And still, the time slips through my fingers.
The reality is that people spend too much time worrying and judging. Children turn out OK whether you put them in daycare or not; everything evens out in the end. You have to do what is best for your family's journey. Stacy agreed and then went on to say that she doesn't worry about what her children will miss by being at home or not, more what she will miss of her children if she works outside the home.
And she nailed it with that comment. In the end, my sweet Emerson will learn to read and write. She'll fall in love and have her heart broken a half dozen times until she finds the "right" one. She'll try her hand at different sports and activities. She'll do all of the things kids do. And through it all, she'll know that Jason and I love her. But, I imagine that at the end of her childhood, she'll hardly remember the days that I stayed home with her during her infant and toddler years, but I will remember. I will remember that I saw her smile for the very first time. I will remember that I taught her to sit and stand and that when you ask her where her mouth is she points to her mouth and smiles. I will remember that it was me who watched her taste oatmeal for the first time. I will remember that I taught her to "turn the page" of her books by herself. I will remember that she giggles all day long, loves to pet her dog and play with her cats' tails. I will remember that when she sees that the gate is open, she makes a bee-line for the stairs because she loves to climb them. I will also remember that she already knows she is not supposed to climb the stairs, as she always looks back at me to see if I am watching her. I will remember the first tantrum she had when I first taught her the word, "no." And I will remember that she follows that first rule already. I will remember that the other day I asked her if I could have one of her blueberries and she shook her head "no" at me. I will remember.
And that is why it is so easy for me to give up an outside job...it's not just Emerson's journey that I am on here, it's my journey...a journey that I enjoy being free of complications and full of memories of new experiences and challenges with this smart, little person. I am thankful that I have the choice to be with her during the day. I am thankful that when Jason gets home at night he is happy to hear from me what she learned and what new tricks are up her little sleeve. I'll never take it for granted. I could smell a million roses, and I would never take the sweet smell for granted. It's been a glorious year.
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